Week 1 Dossier
2024 is my year! This isn’t JUST some mantra you’ve made up in your head, like some “self-help” BS. No, you worked your ass off this entire Summer with the countless hours of YouTube you’ve binged! This year’s championship won’t be yours because you earned it… you were CALLED to it. Like a sacred trust, this responsibility falls to you because no one else was born to bear such a heavy burden as you.
Surprise Attack!
Hey, maybe you haven't been keeping up on current events, but we just got our asses kicked, pal!
Hudson - Aliens
Tora! Tora! Tora!
2024 is my year! This isn’t JUST some mantra you’ve made up in your head, like some “self-help” BS. No, you worked your ass off this entire Summer with the countless hours of YouTube you’ve binged! This year’s championship won’t be yours because you earned it… you were CALLED to it. Like a sacred trust, this responsibility falls to you because no one else was born to bear such a heavy burden as you.
Thursday evening rolls in and you can barely contain what you have waited months to unleash on every poor soul in your leagues. This is just another BUG Hunt! I’m gonna lay waste to these mofo’s-
Mark Andrews - 2/2 for 14 yds
Travis Kelce - 3/4 for 34 yds
Dalton Kincaid - 1/2 for 11 yds
Trey McBride - 5/9 for 30 yds
Evan Engram - 1/4 for 5 yds
Jake Ferguson - 3/5 for 15 yds and hurt
Those are TEs! Of course, I wasn’t dumb enough to invest early capital in them! If you take a look at my elite wide-
Amon-Ra St. Brown - 3/6 for 13 yds
Puka Nacua - 4/4 for 35 yds and on IR
Marvin Harrison Jr - 1/3 for 4 yds
Chris Olave - 2/2 for 11 yds
Brandon Aiyuk - 2/5 for 28 yds
Drake London - 2/3 for 15 yds
Michael Pittman Jr - 4/8 for 31 yds
DK Metcalf - 3/4 for 29 yds
Zay Flowers - 6/10 for 37 yds
Amari Cooper - 2/9 for 16 yds
Terry McLaurin - 2/4 for 17 yds
All of the Bears Receivers
But wait, if they played bad, that means….. Oh God, MY SUPERFLEX QBs!!!
Kyler Murray - 162 passing yds, 1 TD (57 yds rushing)
Caleb Williams - 93 passing yds (15 yds rushing)
Brock Purdy - 231 passing yds (11 yds rushing)
Joe Burrow - 164 passing yds (15 yds rushing)
Trevor Lawrence - 162 passing yds, 1 TD (8 yds rushing)
Justin Herbert - 144 passing yds, 1 TD (6 yds rushing)
Kirk Cousins - 155 passing yds, 1 TD, 2 INTs
Deshaun Watson - 169 passing yds, 1 TD, 2 INTs (39 yds rushing)
Aaron Rodgers - 167 passing yds, 1 TD, 1 INT (-1 yds rushing)
Daniel Jones - 186 passing yds, 2 INTs (15 yds rushing)
Bo Nix - 138 passing yds, 2 INTs (35 yds rushing, 1 TD)
Will Levis - 127 passing yds, 1 TD, 2 INTs (36 yds rushing)
Bryce Young - 161 yds passing, 2 INTs (12 yds rushing, 1 TD)
That makes no sense! If all of the QBs played poorly and all the WRs and TEs suffered because of it, then who the hell scored all the points in week 1?!
Saquon Barkley - 132 total yds, 3 total TDs
De’Von Achane - 100 total yds, 1 TD
Joe Mixon - 178 total yds, 1 TD
Kenneth Walker III - 109 total yds, 1 TD
Alvin Kamara - 110 total yds, 1 TD
Rhamondre Stevenson - 126 total yds, 1 TD
Aaron Jones - 109 total yds, 1 TD
Jordan Mason - 152 total yds, 1 TD
J.K. Dobbins - 139 total yds, 1 TD - HE HAS RISEN!
HA! You thought you figured out fantasy football, didn’t ya?! Every piece of data and every single person in the space has championed WRs and a bounce back for QBs in 2024. Turns out the move was to scoop up all the value that fell at RB, especially in the early-mid rounds.
To be clear, I am obviously overreacting to Week 1. What other coping mechanism do I have when crumpling up my early retirement speach (my retirement, my spouse would still work)? Luckily for most people, just about everyone in your league suffered lower scoring. When looking at the first six rounds of SF Dynasty Startup ADP:
Standard Scoring, SF, 0 TE premium -
Only 9 of the top 17 QBs scored above 15 pts (52.9%)
7 of the top 18 RBs scored above 15 pts (38.9%)
6 of the top 29 WRs scored above 15 pts (20.7%)
1 of the top 8 TEs scored above 10 pts (12.5%)
Don’t panic, its only week 1. Defenses have the edge early in the season while teams acclimate to their new offenses and players continue to develop chemistry with one another (or so they say). Worst case scenario, you grow impatient and by week 3 you have to trade away Amon-Ra St. Brown for the incredible haul of Jordan Mason, Derek Carr, Baker Mayfield, J.K. Dobbins, Allen Lazard, Alec Pierce, Isaiah Likely, and Foster Moreau.
Waiver Targets
The South Harmon Agency has more high-tier operatives gathering intel than ever before. Be sure to keep your channel open and collect data from the various sources as it comes in. In terms of FAAB bidding, review your league’s previous waiver behavior to navigate the wire best. The waiver wire will become more bare as the season continues, especially in best ball formats.
ReDraft (most of these players will be rostered in Dynasty leagues)
Jordan Mason - 56% rostership, spend 20-35% FAAB (The Madden Curse is alive and well. Mason is an RB1 on this SF team for every calamity that befalls CMC)
Brandin Cooks - 39% rostership, spend 15-20% FAAB (With Ferguson hurt, Cooks is the clear #2 on an offense looking to repeat as the highest-passing team in the league)
Rashid Shaheed - 44% rostership, 15-20% FAAB (Perfect upside player for Best Ball formats, his only issue has been staying consistently healthy)
Demarcus Robinson - 12% rostership, 12-15% FAAB (The #2 on a high-powered offense as long as Puka is out and was a league winner last year)
Greg Dortch - 11% rostership, 12-15% FAAB (A favorite target for Kyler and has proven to be a reliable player with past play)
Tank Bigsby - 11% rostership, 10-12% FAAB (very surprising considering how bad he was last year but an offseason of “chopping wood” and other types of Mr. Miyagi training seems to have done him a world of good)
Bucky Irving - 25% rostership, 10% FAAB (great project profile, but draft capital, landing spot, and size were all previous deterring factors. If he continues dominant play, the Bucs will have to play him more despite the same skillset as White)
Justice Hill - 12% rostership, 8-10% FAAB Best Ball only (Will likely only out-snap King Henry in negative game scripts but the Ravens have always loved Hill for his versatility as runner and pass-catcher)
Alexander Mattison - 10% rostership, 8-10% FAAB (Mattison > Zamir, plus Alex has pass-catching upside)
Tucker Kraft - 6% rostership, 8-10% FAAB (Has apparently supplanted Luke Musgrave as the Packers TE1, but it doesn’t matter until Love is healthy again)
Wan’Dale Robinson - 19% rostership, 5-8% FAAB (has the #2 role locked up behind Nabers, but it's the Giants…)
Jalen McMillan - 13% rostership, 5-8% FAAB (If Baker continues his high level of play, the WR3 could have some decent weeks, especially in Best Ball)
Dynasty
Tyler Johnson - 0% rostership, 3-5% FAAB in Best Ball only (Only has appeal as long as Puka is out and has competition with Kupp, Robinson, Colby, & Whittington)
Jalen Nailor - 34% rostership, 5% FAAB (outside of JJ, the offense is wide open to opportunity with so many key pass-catchers hurt)
A Taste of Things to Come
Here is what you can expect from the weekly Dossier this season:
Team Situation Reports (SITREP) - Replacing the commonly utilized “Game Recap,” Field Agents can expect breakdowns of the NFL into 4 Tiers of Team Rankings: Superpowers, Besieged Powers, Depressed States, and Failed States. Beginning with the Failed State Franchises, you’ll receive an overview of the team’s performances, critical Usage Activity reports for players, and actionable projections. Each team will receive two SITREPs throughout the season.
Bona Fides - The South Harmon Agency has the most rigorous testing program for each cornerstone position in fantasy football. Data pertains to the top-ranking players in each statistical category of major importance. Field Agents can begin pursuing high-value assets for their championship missions with this intel.
Agency Bulletin - These assets are heavily vetted by our intelligence officers and qualify as our highest-priority trade candidates based on performance, value, and rest-of-season projections. The Agency looks to continue building on the high success rate of last year’s campaign.
Field Reports - Classified Reports from the Agency’s Department of Intelligence & Field Operations. These in-depth manuals combine the latest analytical research, strategies, and tactics for our highest-tiered operatives.
Your Superior Officers will be in contact with you throughout the 2024 mission. Good luck.
The Dossier
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